Woodland Critters

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Porcupiney: [feeling a kick] Oooo.
Beary: You all right, Lady Porcupiney?
Porcupiney: Oh yes, just felt a little kick is all.
Beavery : Well, it's been much too long now. Uh I'm afraid our helpful friend Stanny must be very dead.
Foxy: Yep, the mountain lion probably swallowed him whole.
Rabbity: I guess that means our Savior is gonna be made into Savior stew.
Critters: Awwww.
Chickadee-y: [flitting straight up into the air] Wait a minute, look! [the animals turn to see Stan approaching them]
Critters: Stanny! [they gather in front of him]
Mousey: Stanny, you're alive.
Beary: But, does that mean you killed the mountain lion?
Stan: It's dead.
Deery: For real and for true?
Beavery: Are you sure.
Stan: I'm sure. It won't be hurting you anymore.
Squirrely: He did it! Now our critter Christmas can finally happen! Hail Satan!
Critters: Hail Satan!
Stan: Wait, wha-what?
Beavery: You've done us a huge favor, Stanny! Without the mountain lion around, the Lady Porcupiney can give birth to the Antichrist!
Critters: Yaaay Satan! [they head over to the manger]
Stan: Waiwait, the Antichrist?? You said she was giving birth to your savior!
Squirrely: Yeah, to the Son of our Lord, Satan, Prince of Darkness.
Stan: But I thought you meant the Son of God!
Deery: Well, think about it: You really think God would have sex with a porcupine?
Chickadee-y: No way! Only Satan, Prince of Darkness and King of all Evil would do that! Yay!
Foxy: This just calls for a celebration! Let's sacrifice Rabbity and eat his flesh!
Rabbity: Yay! Sacrifice me to the Devil!